My first boyfriend of 2 and a half years when I was 14/15 started to have sexual impulses that I was not was asking or ready for. Forcing me up against a wall in public, at school, with his hands up my shirt or in between my legs. On days that he was short tempered I would be left exposed trying to cover myself up while he left me alone to deal with my emotions and my messy half clothed body. He then would threaten me that he would kill himself if I ever broke it off with him. After almost 3 years of this abuse and torture I had the courage to break things off with him. Which you would think that is amazing and my life went on for the better right? NO.... Instead he spread awful rumors about me all over our small town high school, where I was constantly passing someone in the hallway whispering my name. My life became engraved with our breakup. My mentally and sexually abusive boyfriend at 15 controlled my social life. So not only was I left very vulnerable, I was also very desperate for a friend that I could trust and confide in. This is where things went wrong.
I was the ONLY FEMALE in a advanced weights class and I attracted attention from my peers... Which is where my life really turned for the worst. I was all alone one day during school and wanting to ditch class I took a walk around the halls, where I bumped into a guy who would frequently stop by my weights class. He then asked if I would want to hang out on Twitter where I agreed to meet him at his car and we would hang out for a bit, and get to know each other better! I am freaking out because this guy is pretty popular and has a lot of friends, if I become friends with him I can get even more friends! Except this friend that I just met had other plans for me. He parked his car in a very isolated secluded place, no people, no cameras, part of a store parking lot. He then blasts the cold AC on high and sits in the back seat of his car. Then invites me to come and join him, which I do. Finding it very odd I sit as far away from him as possible, every bone in my body is screaming to run away to the school which is 2 blocks away. My mind immediately goes blank when he physically moves my entire body on top of him with one arm. My legs feel as of they are breaking from the way he positioned me like a doll to straddle him. Shoving his tongue down my thoat and touching my breasts, he then tries to undress me. Due to his lack of knowledge on how women's clothes work I was at least able to keep my clothes on. He then decides to position me on my back and shove my whole body into the car door where my head is getting smashed. Deciding that he then still didn't have enough room to maneuver, he crushes my whole body even further into the door of his car. Then trying to pleasure himself, he decides to feel me up from head to toe. My mind goes black and numb with the pain that I am feeling in my skull. I snapped back into reality with him fingering me and trying to undo my pants. Where I then go into fight mode and he then decides to give up on undressing me. He moves on quickly to slamming his body in-between me and is now humping me, constantly smashing my whole body against the door over and over and over again. The only thing that stopped him was when he finally checked the time. He then SILENTLY drove me back to school where he dropped me off like a hooker. I immediately start hyperventilating and speed walked to the bathroom gagging and throwing up. I go home and pretend that nothing happened thinking that the whole thing was my fault and that i was a complete slut and asking for it and that I was now dirty. I shut myself in my room, dealing with an intense migraine.
The next day I wake up to an even worse headache, and sensitivity to lights. At lunch my headache progressively got worse, and I was starting to get sweaty and super nauseous. My tongue started to swell, I was seeing stars, the room was spinning uncontrollably, and I couldn't throw up, or breath very good. My friend practically carries me to the office where they collapse me to a table, the school cop decided that I wasn't okay at all and called the ambulance, which then means that I would have to now tell them and my mom what happened the day before. The ambulance shows up and I wasn't breathing okay and then my mom showed up and I started telling her how sorry I was and how I was so dirty and gross. She told me that it wasn't my fault, after my whole breakdown sob to my mom on what happened to me, I had to be physically carried to my mom's car to go to the hospital where the nurses and the cop who took my statement where so rude and short tempered to me! I at this point was physically and emotionally 100% drained, I could no longer walk or talk. After getting x-rays to confirm if I had fractured my neck or not I could go home. I had a serious concussion where I couldn't over stimulate my brain for over a month! I then started to have insane neck and back pain months later. After getting an appointment with a chiropractor, come to find out my spine was now collapsing and was almost untreatable without surgery. I received intense rehab at the chiropractor for 9 months 3 days a week for an hour. Onto the court side of things, the STATE ATTORNEY decided to take on my case and charge the son of a bitch who did this to me. AFTER A YEAR of waiting and him running around preaching about how he almost fucked me and how I was like this trophy to him, while I on the other hand was constantly being bullied, belittled, mistreated by my peers and teachers. I suffered while he flourished for his senior year, everyone knew me or knew my name. The end results of court was that he got a Class B Felony as a minor. Therefore all traces of me and what that monster did to me would disappear. It has been 4 years since and I am still having days of breakdown from my experience, I have learned a lot, but I have lost more. Still trying to build onto of what has been broken and hoping that everything doesn't all come down.
